It's so cold outside and all I can hear is the wind whipping at my car doors but my mind is a million miles away. I've already tried searching for some inspiration to stimulate my writing, but nothing seems to want to stick. Andof course, like usual, I have already forgotten most of the ideas I was so excited to use, because my mind doesn't really want to settle right now...well not really ever these days.
It can't be bothered by my trivial daily pursuits. Most days I feel as though I am really putting it out just asking it to sit still and quiet down. I need to clear myself of all the insanity and unnecessary clutter that means nothing in the scheme of things ! Jeez come to think of it...hmmmm...where was I gong with that thought? (Squint eyes, furrow brow, scratch the back of my neck). Follow the little butterfly...lalala
Oh yeah! I have to barter with my mind quite often, begging it to give me simple words, common thoughts...things I have taught others and known for years, but mostly it refuses and goes about its business making my life chaos!
I think, and there are many labels for this, we can call it "Monkey mind"!
So yeah...I have a monkey mind, always did!
What is monkey mind, some of you may ask? Well that's a mind that goes about, on its own. Creating futures, fixating on the past. A mind that travels everywhere except here... now! A mind that jumps from thought to thought and is always elusive... never sitting still or remaining calm.
I most definitely have that problem, along with just plain, old, simple not going to work mind! Out to lunch, no one home mind and I am just plain not giving you what you need mind! And I am really exhausted. Exhausted from trying to remember that my keys are actually in my left hand or my purse is under the seat...where I put it 30 seconds ago. Tired of getting in and out of the car because I forgot what I just ran in the house 3 times already for! WHAT???
So here I am, asking my brain to help me out! I beg for simple words or profound mindfulness, but to no avail I have failed to create any cohesive relationship. I make all kinds of excuses these days for it, "I 'm tired , not enough sleep, it's just hormones, I have too many projects in the works"...etc. and they are all true, except I know that little monkey mind is swing around somewhere in that head of mine laughing and waiting. Waiting to confuse me, or to run away and hide more of my thoughts, words and ideas, leaving me scratching my head and awkwardly trying to remember the very names of my own family!
So I wonder when it's going to officially move out. When the day will come that I will be left in the dark and totally unaware that I ever had a working mind at all? I am sure when that day arrives, I will be left with little concern for the loss of words and names that routinely reek havoc on me. I am determined to find solace in the the present. A present that will always be new and current and I will smile and greet everything as though it is for the very first time. Till then, I will keep chasing my tail and appreciate whatever small vocabulary it chooses to beseech upon me, even if the words are a garbled conundrum of gobbley gook and my thoughts are a cartwheeling dervish of insanity!
I will prevail with or without a brain...because the jokes on my monkey mind, I would rather have no thoughts at all!!!!
Andrea trains riders and horses alike and knows the importance of remaining focused on each movement. Learning how to stay focused and in the present moment is no easy task but can practiced on a daily basis with just the simple technique of mindful breathing throughout the day. Taking a moment to consciously inhale.126.96.36.199 and exhale 188.8.131.52 will bring about a calmer, quieter mind, body and create a expansive spirit. Read more about yoga and meditation weekly here or on any one of these wonderful blogs that I support: